SYNOPSIS

Nesta Archeron is depressed and alone, drinking and sexing her way through her emotions and guilt. One night she spends an exorbitant amount of The Night Court’s money on drinking and gambling debts. Fed up, Feyre, Rhys, Cassian, and Amren give her an intervention and cut her off of their resources. They give her two options. To be dumped in the human lands alone where she must fight for her life or to live in the House of Wind with Cassian and Azriel, attending trainings with Cassian in the mornings, and working in the library in the afternoons. What could possibly happen?

MY RECAP AND REVIEW

This book is told in a dual perspective of Nesta and Cassian throughout each chapter. I think this book gets undeserved hate because people don’t like Nesta. It’s my favorite one out of the series and you honestly don’t need to read any of the others to read this one. The author recaps anything important you need to know.

This is a book about grief, PTSD, and true self loathing. To me, Sarah J. Maas explored these topics in a deeper way with Nesta than she did with Feyre. This entire book goes through Nesta’s journey. We see her numb, distant, and “uncaring” after the war and seeing her father die in front of her. We see her self pity in not being included somewhere she claims she doesn’t want to be. We eventually feel her guilt from her past actions, and we see her self awareness in how it’s affected how she treat others and how she’s treated. We see the ways she changes and holds herself back from being cruel. We see how she learns to cope and let people in and become physically strong and mentally strong as she faces her fears.

Nesta is distant and cold. That’s how she protects herself to keep people away. It can come across poorly, but I think she’s truly misunderstood because no one has empathy or even sympathy for her, so they don’t truly know her. I don’t understand why everyone is so hard on her but gives Elain passes. Elain also didn’t go out to hunt with Feyre. She also allowed her younger sister to provide for their family. Elain also went through a time of depression and self isolation. Elain was pitied and loved at her lowest in a way Nesta wasn’t, except by Cassian and sometimes Feyre. I don’t get it because I don’t think anything she said or did is unforgivable, honestly. Rude sure. But not so bad she can’t be forgiven. Maybe it’s because they really are scared of her power.

I kinda hate how after she saved Feyre, then Rhys wanted to shower Nesta in love and gifts. I get it story wise. Feyre and Nesta’s relationship was tumultuous and he didn’t like her very much. This just adds to what I’m saying though. Very few people give Nesta the benefit of the doubt and because of this, they feed into Nesta’s own narrative that she’s a monster and doesn’t deserve kindness or grace or love. When people are feeding into your negative beliefs, it only continues to tank your own self image. So again, I get it story wise; I just wish it didn’t take something that drastic for Rhys to change his tune towards her.

The portrayal of her PTSD and her coping were great. She was numbing the pain in men and music and alcohol and at the time, it seemed she didn’t know fully that’s what she was doing. That’s real. The family reaction with the ultimatum is questionable, though ultimately the intentions were nice. They were trying to help her get her life back on track and give her some sort of purpose, which I can appreciate. Still, they’re not very nice to her.

Like with ACOTAR 3.5, it’s hard reading how she was pushed out of the inner circle and how there were even visuals of how much she wasn’t a part of it. I know Nesta chose not to be close to them, but you could still put a painting on the wall for her. How can she believe you want what’s best for her when you intentionally leave her out? It’s just petty and again, I know that Nesta lashes out and is not perfect and no one has to put up with it, even if it comes from a place of trauma. I just feel like she could’ve been treated better.

Regardless, Nesta wants to be better and do better and fight her inner demons and trauma. And because she wants to, she tries and eventually succeeds. It’s beautiful to read.

Cassian and Nesta’s love story is fun to read. They become roommates, then lovers, then friends, then more. A heads up that there are more sex scenes in this book than the others. Cassian and Nesta’s relationship is a big part of the book. They lean on each other in some ways and let each other into their own insecurities. They fight their attraction for a little bit. They’re my favorite and I’m really happy to see how they’re relationship played out from both of their perspectives

There are a few other subplots that I’m not going to get into. An honorable mention is that Nesta finds her chosen family and I love that for her. These other storylines are what make the book as long as it is. A part of me feels like some of it could be cut, but I honestly don’t know what would be. It made it a complete and well rounded story and I enjoyed it all, even though it did run long.

OVERALL

Overall, I give this book a 4 out of 5 stars. It is my favorite of the series and has made me love Nesta more than I had before. She’s one of the most nuanced character in the series and this book allowed us to see that. If there is one book from the series I’d suggest, it’s this one, solely because of how we see her entire journey and how relatable it is.